Needs & Expectations

There are many times when those you love just hasn’t got the resources, emotional or physical, to show up for you in your tough time. Perhaps they show up in the beginning, then trail off, or maybe they show up sporadically, or maybe they are actually showing up regularly but during the tough time our needs and expectations are so enormous we are left disappointed and feeling abandoned anyway. But sadly, what ever the reason behind the absence of that person during a tough time, it usually frays the delicate bonds of the relationship and a crack appears. It throws into question what the relationship is, or will be, it brings up questions of trust, trust that he/she can be counted on when you are in trouble. Also what might be expected of yourself when someone else is in trouble. During extended droughts in our lives we need to learn the art of self soothing and taking care of our own tough feelings. That said, no man is an island and expecting ourselves not to need friends at all is also a recipe for emotional disease. This balance, like all good balances, is one we all have to take time and patience to explore.

Live life

Fascination is the result of your curiosity level. If you're a dead bored corpse, walking around contemplating suicide, nothing will fascinate you as much as maybe Blue Whale. But if you're an excited bubble of joy floating from soap to finger, you'll get to touch another being, burst into a new form, dive through thin air and become rain and its bows and its vapour and its moss. So much transformation would cover at least 5 human reincarnations. So stop routine dying. Start multidimensional living. There's just too much out there that they refuse to make ads for.

Sky or sea?

She: How much do you love me? Like the sky or the sea? 

He: Like the sea. 

She: Why? 

He: Because the ocean has unfathomable depths. You can dive in into the ocean. And be inside it. Unlike the sky, the ocean can be felt. It will caress your feet, go away and will come back again!

Worthless

She sat in her room staring at the wall

Knowing she could never be anything more than worthless.
Tears escaping her bloodshot eyes,
She replayed the memories one last time.
Digging the blade deep into her skin,
She hid her pain and sat there broken and torn.
Wishing she could go back to being that
Once bright and happy soul he loved.
But she will soon become a shell.
A shell no one loves, no one cares about.
Behind closed doors she cried herself to sleep.
Tears burning rivers into her face
Cuts opening pathways to her soul
She wished if he could just come back to her.
She hoped he read this and realize that the girl he loved once, wrote this
while fighting back tears and memories.
She sat here writing her feelings into this poem.
Spilling the words onto a word doc,
wondering whether he is also awake thinking of her.

Go love, beautiful.

It's so beautiful to make peace with the inability of knowing beyond your absolute present.

It's beautiful to collect and connect and relate and debate.

It's so beautiful to power.

It's beautiful to star shower.

Go be beautiful, love.

And go love, beautiful.

Unanswered kisses

You always kiss me

when my mouth is full of questions.

You didn't want to say it,

or we both knew

you were not going to stay.

Mine

I'm in love with you
and your entire being.
Your hands
and the way they hold mine.
Your eyes
and the way they look at mine.
Your lips
and the way they fit with mine.
Everything about you,
is all mine.